Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Try Not To Suck Any Dick On The Way Through the Parking Lot

I got finger-fucked today. In the mouth. By a man I'd just met. In fact, I had to take the lead with a, "Hello, I don't believe we've met, I'm Trixie Bang Bang. Who are you?" And then he told me to open wide and shoved some gloved hands in my mouth and proceeded to prod me in my soft tissues.

Oh, yeah, and I had a dentist appointment today.

For which all those years of dick-sucking proved to be a good training ground for getting my gag reflex under control. Because really, I can't think of too much more mouth discomfort than having those winged x-ray cards shoved way back in my mouth, between my cheek and gum.

You may be wondering any of the following:
  • How many dicks do you have to suck to get your gag reflex under control?
  • Why didn't she know the dentist, I know she's been to the guy before.

Well, let me address your concern. While it was the same dental office as my prior trip, they have a mishmash of dentists and I had a different dude than before. The other dude was the youngish, cuteish one with the new wife who wanted to go to Disneyland (or World, the one in Florida) for her honeymoon, and I mocked the choice. This new dude seemed nice enough.

However.

He was a wet-talker.

When he talked, some spittle came out and landed right on my open-mouthed face (his hands were in my mouth). And some hit my lips, which is really rather intimate, don't ya think?

And? His breath, for being a dentist, was a little on the "old man smell" side. And he wasn't that old. And our faces were very close to each other.

Lastly? I have to go back. It appears I have a nearly-indiscernible cavity or something forming between some teeth. And he'd like to talk me into $5000 worth of cosmetic dentistry. Maybe he really is just trying to do anything to get into my mouth.

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