Sunday, November 30, 2008

Pie Hole

A table for five apparently needs to include two kinds of turkey (one home-roasted, one Honeybaked), ham, apple sausages, stuffing, mashed potatoes, squash, yams, corn, beans and three types of cranberry dishes.
Good thing we didn't plan on cooking much this year. Thanksgiving was celebrated at Marge & Stanley's house, with just Linda and myself as additional company for the main meal schedule. Kenny had to work, so he joined us later in the evening for his holiday platter. Sophie was a tentative, and she balked at the last minute, she said she hadn't been feeling well. She spent the holiday alone again, in her little house, but at 91 I guess she can do what she wants. I'm done cajoling. I'm supposed to go out there this afternoon (her plan), but am going to decline. I don't feel like it today, I need a day to get things done (such as this very important time-spending activity).
Here's Linda with her Japanese Chin, Mickey. He's a pretty good boy, but doesn't really have much use for me. I'm okay with that.

He runs from Kenny, too, but Kenny will pursue him til capture, and then try and Dog Whisper him.
After a nice day spent visiting, eating and listening to some Christmas music, we ended the day on a pie note:

Apple-Carmel with butter-pecan ice cream and pumpkin with cool whip.
All-in-all, a nice quiet day spent together. As we were leaving Friday morning for Atlantic City, I didn't need a hopped-up holiday event. We took very little leftovers home with us since we weren't going to be around, and finished the evening up by packing for our trip. We had to get up at 6:30 a.m., which is fucked up. Who plans a trip that early on a holiday?? Well, we did it, but not without a fair share of complaints.
Our trip was fun, and I liked it even more since it was just one night. I like being home with a whole day to get caught-up before the start of another workweek. We gambled a lot and I was nearly broke by 3 p.m. on the first day. Things were looking downright grim. Ken and I went to the room and decided to take a nap. I needed a timeout from spending, as it wasn't really working out for me, and we were both tired from the early morning. So we napped and Ken headed back to the tables around 5:00 p.m., and I continued to nap until about 7:30. I wandered back downstairs then, with my lowly $40 in my pocket and $200 in pity-money from Kenny. He'd been doing pretty well at three-card poker, and while I don't mind sharing in winnings, pity-money leaves a sour taste in my mouth so I wasn't eager to spend it. I played some game with my $40, and managed to parlay it into $100. Then I joined Kenny at the card tables and finally caught a break, ending up with $750 back in my pocket and Kenny's $200 handed back to him. It was a good ending to the day! I didn't have to stay in the room on Saturday reading the 3rd book in the Twilight Series. I brought it with me, just in case.
Saturday ended up pretty good, not ahead, but we didn't get a total bad-beat. The money that came home with us will be traveling to Vegas in less than two weeks.
I've got some surprise shit to take care of today. Well, it was a surprise on Thursday night. When I went to pack for our trip, I looked in one of our bigger suitcases and discovered I haven't unpacked it since our cruise. What the fuck! I thought I was all caught up with every stitch of laundry last weekend, but there was a whole suitcase full of more stuff. Nothing I had apparently been missing, mostly warm-weather wear. But it still needs to get washed and folded and packed away for next year. Huh. I used to be so on top of laundry, I would unpack as soon as I got home from a trip, but that doesn't seem to be the case any longer.
I'm going to go do that as soon as I get done sitting in the recliner. That may take awhile...

Flying Fig

Harrah's Hotel in Atlantic City provides complimentary clarifying shampoo with extracts of wild fig & ivy. Not just any figs, but wild ones. What makes these figs so wild?? Have they appeared in Joe Francis videos? And why would I want to put that on my hair? I'm usually trying to tame my hair, not encourage wildness.

I tried it anyway. I went a little wild after. But I can't talk about it, 'cause what happens in Atlantic City, stays in Atlantic City. You'll have to go there and try the wild fig & ivy shampoo yourself.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Waste Not...

1.) I used the peeled onion that Sophie sent me home with last week. It did not go to waste, and was repurposed (isn't that the Go Green term of the month??) into Apple-Onion Bourbon Sauce.
2.) As mentioned above, the apples haven't been used yet in a pie, but some were used for sauce. Not a total waste.
3.) The cauliflower remains purposeless. It's still sitting forlornly in the refrigerate, anxious to see if it meets with the trash on Tuesday night, or if will have had a Purpose Driven Life.

Suck This

Maybe Fsteve was right. Perhaps adolescent-level reading IS my level. While it certainly wasn't dense, thought-provoking writing, I thoroughly enjoyed Twilight, and now have an unhealthy obsession with vampires. I just asked Kenny if we'd be visiting Denali while we're on our Alaska Adventure next year, as there is purportedly a coven of Vamps up there.
That writer was pretty clever. She ends the book with the beginning of the next book as a teaser. I could not get to sleep last night, replaying the cliffhanger scene in my mind, and anxious as to how they're going to get out of that mess. I have the next book at work, resting comfortably on a shelf, when it should be HERE, NOW so that I could be finding out just exactly how Edward saves Bella this time. I thought about going to work and getting it, but rationally reminded myself that I've got too many things to do today to get absorbed in that love story right now. But I did have to take some nighttime cold medicine in order to get to sleep last night, I was that charged up at 1 a.m.
I have had more get-up-and-go this weekend than I've had in a very long time. I don't know if I am correctly attributing it to these new vitamins I purchased Friday night at Wal*Mart, or if it's just that my hormones are on an even keel, or if perhaps I'm really Manic-Depressive like my sister, Britney Spears, and I'm on a "high." Whatever, I've been a whirling dervish around the house since I took that chromium Friday night with dinner. It's claim is to even out the blood sugars, giving more energy and a host of other promises. All I know for sure is that I busted my ass around the house Friday night, not heading to bed until 3:15 a.m. (granted, I had the book to keep me interested that late at night), and then Saturday Kenny and I embarked on another quest of Basement Cleaning. Jeezus Christ, we worked for five solid hours down there - and it's still a hotmess. I really need Neecy from Clean House to show up.
Anyway, back to the basement. Kenny and his business partner haven't been able to lock down a new office space so back home all his shit is coming. The people who owned the building sold it, and the guys have til December 1st to get their shit out. Well, they were told they could have part of the warehouse space until January 1st, but I advised Kenny to rethink leaving any of his stuff there on a promise. What if they just locked 'em out and took all their stuff? It's his livelihood, not a hobby, and he would be so fucked right in the ass if that happened. So yesterday he started hauling shit home, and the Basement Cleaning Project began in earnest.

The problem with the basement is this: We have so much stuff between the two of us, and a lot of it is a/ either too expensive to just toss out, even if we're not currently using it or b/ something we may want to use one day. So we've got an Ebay pile compiled, and will try to sell some of the stuff, and the other stuff we're trying to reorganize in an out-of-the-way place. And then the remainder is going on the trash pile. Fsteve, if you have any interest in some of your shit you may want to do a drive-by on Tuesday night. I mean, we have got DVD players, computers, scanners, printers, TVs (which won't work after February without the special converter box), clothing, tables, lamps, misc. kitchen gadgets, speakers - all sorts of stuff that we just have to make the decision to part with. I know we could donate it, but we need to get the space cleared this week. We're taking an afternoon break to blog and watch football, and will be heading back down for Round 2 later today.
The upside of spending so many hours in the basement was that I managed to get every stitch of laundry washed and folded. Towels, bedding, all sorts of piles of stuff that had just been sitting there, getting pushed aside in favor of clean undies and such. Another project, putting away all the cleaned laundry. I need a maid.
After all that cleaning, we showered and went out for some Mexican food and a margarita. The perfect end to a hard day's work.

It's been a busy Sunday morning (well, afternoon, but it's morning in my world), I've got a rigatoni/pepperoni casserole baking in the oven and I created a new dessert. It's a variation of tiramisu, but as I don't have marscapone cheese on hand, I used a pumpkin pudding mix instead. Mixed that with some cream cheese, added a little espresso and rum, soaked the lady fingers in a concoction of coffee and brandy, layered it all and topped it with cool whip. It's going to be a tastebud extravaganza this evening. Or it will all go in the trash.

We're heading into Thanksgiving Weekend, excited about that. Not sure what our plans are yet, we may be dining out somewhere. That's fine with me, it will be different, but could be nice with no mess to deal with. Kenny's working on Thanksgiving Day. I'm sure we'll see a movie that night, it's tradition. Last year I believe I saw Sweeney Todd. We head to Atlantic City Friday morning, a quick overnight junket. Always something fun to look forward to. Good thing, after this weekend of cleaning, clearing, hauling and packing.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Drafty Cracks

Old Man Winter, he don't play. He has rolled into town and whipped our asses. At least mine. I thought the little bit of snow and cold earlier in the week was just a little bit of messin' with ya, but nope - woke up Friday morning to Pure Winter Business. Fuck. I got reacquainted with scrapping snow off my car, cursing all the while. Going on four years of it, I should be used to it by now, but I don't think I will ever make my peace with snow up my snatch at 7:30 a.m.

On top of all that, I hadn't even saran-wrapped the windows yet - but I remified (a made-up word, that) the situation with an after-work trip to Wal*Mart where I purchased the weather stripping and plastic. I've been a busy mo'fucka all night. I wrapped up the two big pneumonia-holes in the living room so far, still have the bedrooms and kitchen to do, but I need to pace myself. I also assembled a lamp I purchased for the living room. I needed a floor lamp to go next to my new recliner so my 42-year-old eyes can have better lighting for ease of reading. Now that I've got the Best Chair Ever, I can actually sit in the living room and read. I'll be so much smarter as a result, I'm sure.

Now that I'm all set up for reading, I'm watching t.v. instead. But. It's that all-alluring, irresistable Supernanny Jo. I am attracted to her, moley face and all. I think she's losing weight. Her pants aren't up her ass the way they normally are. She's even more irresistible.

While at Wal*Mart, I purchased a new pillow for Kenny. He's had the worst pillow situation since I moved in and threw his pillow out when he wasn't paying attention. It just looked disturbing, it had seen better days, but he liked it. When did that ever matter, though. I thought I could sneak a new one in without him noticing. But I didn't, and for the last three years he's been pillow-uphappy, and we periodically try new ones for him. His last one cost $2.50. It lasted quite a while, but eventually did what all of his pillows do - assumed a sausage-like shape. I don't know what he does or how he sleeps, but they all become a humped up tube, all lumpy and uncomfortable. I ponied up and spend $20 for his new one, it has potential. I'd feel worse, but I bought us each new $90 Down pillows when I threw his other one out, and he just doesn't like it. It's the reason the cat has a $90 pillow to call his own at night. Someone might as well use it.

Alright, I'm off to give Supernanny my undivided attention. She beckons me.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Yeah, Right

Who am I kidding, I can't stop sharing the ridiculous parts of my life! But maybe I'll try to do more interesting things, to give this some substance. Maybe. Easy to say from the comfort of my recliner, which, by the way, has not been conducive to my Getting A Life. But that's for another day. I've got to go get to reading, Twilight awaits.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Same Hat....

....Different Year.

Reviewing my blog I realized that I blab about the same shit week in and week out: household organization issues, my Vaj, pooping, Sophie, cats and travel/trips. Jeez. I think I need to spend my time in more lucrative ways. I'm going nowhere fast at this pace.
So instead, rather than blogging about the mundane and often disturbing parts of my life, I'm going to try for something of a little more substance. Oh, I may post a funny little snippet of conversation here or there, but this weekly nonsense is at an end. Like Jack Bauer, I'm going Dark.

Sunday, November 16, 2008


When we ported in Labadee during the second week of our cruise last month, I was the only one in our party who wanted to get off the ship. Everyone else was happy to stay on board and enjoy the nearly-private pool amenities and such, but I wasn't done with blue waters and white sand. Even if I had just seen it the week before, as it was a double stop for us.
So I set off on my own and rented a floating beach mat, found my little spot in the shade for my things, and set to floating around the water and doing some serious people watching. I paid particular attention to a guy and a little boy, who bypassed me and were headed out to even deeper waters. I was already at a spot that was over my head, and the waters were rather rough due to the Hurricane that was passing thru San Juan. So it was choppy and deep and this little dude was swimming out past me. Well, after a few more minutes, the man sent the little boy back to shore by himself, and the man continued out further with his snorkel equipment. I could see the little fella dogpaddling like hell (he was a rather adept swimmer), and as he got closer to me I shoved my beach mat in his direction so he could grap onto the edge and rest a little bit.
He was happy about that and caught his breath for a few minutes and then we started chatting. I tried to talk to him, but found out he spoke German and didn't have much of an understanding of English. With the universal "thumbs up" sign, I was able to communicate that it was okay for him to stay on the mat if he wanted to and we bopped along in the water together for a while, each enjoying the swell of the waves with the security of a floater beneath us.
I started testing the waters of the language barrier and asked him how old he was, asking if he was 8 years old, pointing at him and holding up 8 fingers. He said, "Yes, I am 8 years old. How old are you?" I replied, "42" (I was already claiming 42 to get myself used to the number) and held up the corresponding fingers. A slight recoil and an exclamation of, "OH MEIN GOTT!" was the response. Yeah, Pal, that's my thought on it too. OH MEIN GOTT. He did proceed to expound on it with, "You say that "Oh My God" we say "Oh Mein Gott." Yeah, I Gott it. That exclamation needed no translation Little Buddy. He told me his mom was 29. Happy Birthday to me :) I'm officially 42. Well, in a few hours anyway. Oh Mein Gott.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

The Barter System

I made a quick trip out to Sophie's today, to squeeze in a visit and deliver some bread I had picked up for her. She LOVES this bread I found at Sam's Club, it's an apple danish crumb bread, and it's so good she says she'd pay up to two dollars and fifty cents for it - it's that good. Now, it costs $3.88, but I won't burst her bubble with that - she wouldn't be able to enjoy it if she knew it was scaring four dollars. So here's what was swapped during the visit:

Tracye brought Sophie:
  • 2 loaves apple danish bread
  • 1 bottle Oil of Olay day cream
  • 3 outdated magazines (Redbook, Oprah, Ladies Home Journal)

Sophie sent Tracye home with the following:
  • Part of a head of cauliflower - enough to go with a hunk of some sorta meat we might have for dinner some night
  • A handful of apples - make some apple sauce or maybe bake a pie, Dolly
  • A peeled onion
  • A bowl of homemade Haluska

Now, some people think Haluska is cabbage and noodles, but true Haluska is made with homemade potato dumplings, which is what Sophie whipped up. They truly are one of my favorite Polish/Hungarian dishes that Sophie makes.

I guess I'd better get ready to bake a pie. I can't let any of these things go to waste, I would be ashamed of myself. But I don't even like cauliflower. Not since The Cauliflower Incident of '93. Well, I'm making up the year on that, but it was during my vegetarian phase and I made a cauliflower sandwich (tasted as bad as it sounds), and I happened to catch the flu shortly after consuming. I haven't been able to get over the mental connection of cauliflower and barfing. Oh, for those who are interested, the cauliflower sandwich consisted of white bread, chopped up cauliflower and ranch dressing. Just thinking about it to this day makes my nose snarl. Maybe Kenny will eat it.


I was making tea and used a Jasmine Ball that I had gotten from God-knows-where, and this is what emerged:

Lucky for me, this was what I had given to Kenny. I was using a simple chamomile bag for myself. He would have probably preferred being tea bagged too, although he'll never admit to it.

Sunday, November 9, 2008


Still not up to par. Having a quieter weekend at home and unfortunately don't have the gumption to do what needs to be done. We did find the energy to put my new flannel sheet set on the bed Saturday and let me tell you, they were snugly and delicious on my achy body. Even Widda came up and made herself at home on Stanley's pillow which is at the top by my head. She didn't budge, not even when Stanley came up and asserted himself, pushing her over to make room for him. He ended up sleeping on her a little bit, and she didn't seem to mind. She was not getting off that flannel pillowcase. I would guess she spent twelve solid hours on that pillow. They're nice, but even I can't stay in bed twelve hours!
We did a little grocery shopping this morning, once I got some wind back beneath my sails. I have a pot roast simmering on the stove, chock full o' carrots, mushrooms, celery, potatoes and onions. Now I must rest again. I made myself a sore throat concoction that's been passed down a few generations. It's simple, but really does the trick. You roll a lemon around, getting it all soft and juicy, then cut a hole in the top (straw-sized) and pour in whiskey and honey, mixing it all up. Sip that concoction with a straw until nothing more is left, and let me tell you, it really does the trick.

So is this what the blogpost is coming down to this week??? Talk of a cat on a pillow and a sore throat remedy? That's just sad. I don't have much more than that, though. You're out of luck if you're looking to me for entertainment this week. Kenny and I went to Bassista and bought a new rocker recliner. I've had it with my living room chair, I've tried to adapt to it and has not cooperated. It looks inviting enough, but oh, no, it's just a trick. It's very puffy, and the back of the chair is so puffy, in fact, that it projects the head forward. After extended sitting (usually an hour of t.v.), my neck is stiff and cramped and I've got a headache in progress. Kenny's tried it, said the same thing. It's just horribly designed. Now, though, I know what to look for, and have tested many a chair before finally settling on a new one. This one will go to the other corner of the room where it can sit and watch me enjoying it's replacement. I'm going to flaunt my new love right in it's face. She gets delivered on Tuesday. I wish it were here yesterday. But that is pretty big news as I've been fighting what could be viewed as an unnecessary purchase. I finally proclaimed enough was enough. You only get so many chances with me before I stick you in a corner and set about ignoring you.
That's it. I'm going to bed to read a book. I need to finish The Poisonwood Bible so I can get into the Twilight series which is all the rage. I have a group of friends who are reading them and it would be fun to all get together and see the movie when it's out. But I need to read the book first.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

I Don't Have Time For This

Feeling a little under the weather today. Was feeling spunkier earlier, but now not so much. Have a cuppa Theraflu, the kind for sore throats, and I'm hoping it lives up to it's promise. I don't really have time to be bedridden this weekend, I have many things I'd like to accomplish.
Just so you know.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

And The Winner Is...

....ME! Yes, I am IRON CHEF AMERICAN GREETINGS, HALLOWEEN OCCASION. I took home the Silver Star for 1st Place Taste, as well as Honorable Mention for Most Unique Recipe.

The Secret Ingredients were: Apple & Pumpkin. I came up with an Apple Sausage with Apple & Onion Bourbon sauce, correctly assuming most people would contribute a sugary confection, and something to cut through all the sugar would reign victorious. I was correct. Plus, it was really fucking tasty stuff.

The Contenders were lined up in the atrium, left to the sampling and voting throughout the day. My sausages didn't last til noon.

Winners Circle Includes: Neil, Honorable Mention Taste (I voted for his cheesecake it was incredible!); Me - HM Unique Recipe, First Place Taste; Cindy, First Place Appearance (it was a beautifully crafted apple pie); Barb, First Place Unique Recipe (she created a pumpkin seed brittle); Tricia & Regan shared Honorable Mention for something. Huh, I guess that's not very gracious of me, to not even care enough about the others to pay attention. It was all about me.

Frankly, I don't know how any beat out this contribution from Ed:

Kenny will never believe me again when I tell him how hard I'm working.

Ruby, Are You Contemplating Going Out Somewhere

Mug Shot of a Jovial Blow-Up Doll:

For the first time in a million years, I participated in costume-required Halloween parties. Not just one, oh, no - we went all-out and attended two dress-up parties, first Friday night, then again on Saturday. The costume that I ordered hadn't arrived by Thursday, so I ran to the store and had to pull together an outfit from whatever was left. I decided on a "Hippie Peacenic." It was that, a slut-o'-ween outfit, which I'm not built for, a Nun (which I am built for, but I was afraid I would go up in flames while wearing), or this. So this won.

Upon review, I realized a few things.

1/In case you haven't noticed, my tits are GIGANTIC. They are officially "Juggs."
2/I look frightening similar to Linda Hogan.
3/I resemble a blow-up doll. Or maybe they resemble me! I have the wrong pose here to know for sure, I need the gape-mouth to really do a fair comparison.

We stayed at the party for a few hours, then headed out to Characters to meet a few other friends and have a beer closer to home. It was a fun Friday night.

As if there was any doubt to what Kenny would be, here he is in all his Indiana Jones glory. He felt very daring and fearless with a whip by his side. Twinkle, however, did NOT care for his costumed character one bit, and would hiss and run as soon as Indy donned his hat. He didn't much care for the blow-up doll/Linda Hogan look, either, he wasn't a fan of the wig. He apparently has hat/fake hair issues.

Katie, one of the party hostesses, was a gypsy. My outfit also failed to give me a waist, as the big puffy sleeves blended right in to everything else. It had nothing to do with the Snickers bars that were consumed.

My original costume idea finally showed up on Saturday (what timing!). Well, it's just a good thing I guess that we had another party to go to, which seemed weird to go to knowing that it was November. I'm telling you, once November hits and Halloween is officially over, it is one holiday that is just DONE - it feels wrong to drag it out even one day longer. But we did, we didn't poop on the party.

So Cleopatra came to life.
And I realized three new things:
1/ If I ever think to myself, "Huh, maybe I should dye my hair black and cut it really short!" - I need to rethink that idea.
2/ I bear a resemblance to Delta Burke and/or Liz Taylor in the Downslide Years.
3/ This wig must have been modeled after Mancy, who actually pays to get this look. I at least wear it with better makeup.

The cats still weren't thrilled with Costumed Characters, but Cleo had to have a cat with her. Here, Widda is captured in Mid-Meep, you can see her little opened cat-mouth:

Twink was less than thrilled about a Cleopatra smoochie, but at least he wasn't hissing, although he does look poised to chomp:

I did a pretty good job on all that makeup. I had planned to get it professionally crafted at the MAC counter, but then came to my senses, I don't need to spend $50 for costume makeup. Years of partying in the 80's equipped me to wield liquid eyeliner and blue eyeshadow like a pro.

Indy and his whip-crackin' lived for one more day:

Like a house of Scrooges (mixing holidays here), we passed out zero candy this year. It's the first time since I've been home that I haven't participated in the Halloween trick-or-treatery. I was busy costuming up, and I only half-assidly (I am making up new words all over the place!) purchased treats, so we said, "Fuck It" and didn't turn the porch light on. And it was all okay anyway.