Saturday, July 26, 2008

Party in Your Pants

One cats trash is a little boy's treasure:

We had what can loosely be called a cookout after work on Friday night, and luckily the cat house hadn't made it all the way to the tree lawn on trash day, it's been sitting out back behind the house. We were intentionally leaving it to see if Street Widda wanted to use it, but so far we hadn't seen any interest in it until Lucas came to the party. He made a beeline to it, and made my heart swell with pride as he made full use of this fine, fine toy.

Our "cookout" was planned by boys. Two Einsteins that live in the house with me. Thursday night the conversation went something like this: "We've got a lot of beef left from last week, beer too. Chairs for the driveway. Let's invite people over after work tomorrow for a driveway party." Well, really, what more does one need? Beef, Beer, Chairs in the Drive. A Trifecta of Fun.

Now, it was fun, don't get me wrong. I had to work really, really hard at not stressing out and running around like crazy in anticipation of it. I just let it all go. People were scheduled to arrive at the time I'm leaving from work, so there really wasn't much I could do, which was good. I did, however, run around for a little while like crazy when I got home, made some baked beans (they did not have ONE side dish planned), threw some grilled onions and lettuce onto a plate for garnish and put a peach cobbler and chocolate cake in the oven for dessert. I happily drank Vodka while doing all that, so it went pretty effortlessly.
Vodka is my new "diet" alcohol. Less calories, more potency. A perfect balance, especially when cut with lemon-lime Sierra Mist. Refreshing!

A good-sized group showed up, including Hot Kim:

Of course, The MaleMan, in all his tanned splendor:

Little Lucas has a magic princess wand and is granting the Boys their wishes:

All-in-all it turned out fun, I didn't get too worked up with the planning/doing/making part of an impromptu get-together, and we called it a night around 11 p.m. It had been a long day and I was eager to get to bed.

Lucas, by the way, is Pete & Vera's grandson, and their pretty little granddaughter Kaylee (sounds like...might not be spelled correct) was there as well, and really flirted quite heavily with the Maleman.....She's almost old enough for him, based on what he's been dating recently! A few more years, Pete, you'd better keep an eye on these shenanigans! I had to keep an eye on Kaylee, I have dibs on Male and I'm not afraid of her, I think I could take her if it came down to it.

Here is the Little Miss:

And that was a Friday night Driveway Party.
With the newest pass-around email showing the large lion who is raised by two dudes who gets reunited with them after being apart for a year, I wanted Kenny and Twinkle to reenact the performance for me. So I tossed Twinkle onto Kenny's head, and this was the result:

Not nearly as poignant of a fake reunion as I had hoped. Twinkle scratched him under the eye and then darted away. Kenny was less than thrilled with the entire incident, which happened around midnight on Thursday. It was officially coded a scratch-n-run incident.

Ghosts & Gobblin'

Sunday afternoon Linda and I attended a psychic luncheon in Medina town square. The festivus was from noon to four, included a delicious lunch, coffee, dessert and ghost stories. Three Mediums were there, and would "read" you as the spirits pulled them. I didn't have a lot going on with my spirits, but Linda had a lot of active spirits who were clamoring for attention.
Nothing really earth shattering was revealed, but enough "specific truths" were mentioned to make us curious enough to schedule a private reading. Reverend Tim was there, he's the dude who read me about 10 years ago, and told me I'd be divorced because I was married to a controlling jerk (so true!), we'd fight about where we'd go on vacations (true, Fsteve always wanted some lame-ass shit like visiting relatives or hauling a batch of stepkids with us somewhere, and never the things that interested me like I get to do now), and that I'd have a baby. Well, so far, two out of three, so I was curious about the last one. Nothing was said, perhaps that was a misread. I hope so, I'm too lazy to have a baby. I had to force myself to get out of bed at 11 a.m. Saturday morning. I imagine I'd have a hard time convincing a baby to sleep to my schedule. So that was that.

Click & Spend
Some major Internet shopping was accomplished, with the purchase of two Alen air purifiers for our house. My online research indicated these are the best, and I'm hoping they do the trick for keeping the pet dander and dust from the kitty litter down a bit. From what I've read, people even sleep better/sounder with these things, clearing the sinus passages and whatnot. I'm just hoping to not wake up with hairballs in my throat! Our cats-to-space ratio is seriously out of alignment, so might as well try what we can to keep the airborne allergens down. And maybe I'll be able to get off the nose spray.

My other Major Purchase of the weekend was a new digital SLR camera, the Olympus Evolt E520. I am excited and nervous to get it. It has a lot of fancy features, sounds a little overwhelming, but my interest outweighs my apprehension at using such a jazzy little gadget. I could be the next Andy Warhol. Or someone. Whoever. Whatever. If nothing else, I'll have quite a Cat Portfolio compiled over my lifetime.
The Internet has certainly made blowing money just that much easier and quicker.
And that is the weekend update. Peace, and be inspired this week.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Rack 'Em Up

Cutest. Purse. Ever.
At least for this season, anyhow. I gifted myself with this cute little patent-leather/signature "C" pattern number and am tickled pink. Especially by the lavender interior lining.

Below picture on the flight to Vegas. Still a terrible picture-taker, but at least I managed to get the important one (me!) - ha ha!

We've managed to LUCK OUT with airline seats our last few trips. We've had rows to ourselves, this time we had an Exit Row with no one in the middle seat. We could sprawl and stretch right out. On the way home we didn't get Exit Row, but we still managed to get Row 11 all to ourselves. I started reading a fun book, so the 4-hour ride home Sunday night literally flew by (get it?? cause we were flying??). And gold star for me for the day with that little pun.

We brought our Haitian Voo Doo dollies with us again. We figured we were on a losing streak because the dollies were sick of sitting at home, so we've been taking them and have coincidentally having better gaming luck. Well, they must not have enjoyed the view, despite the lovely room they got to hang out in, because we were not nearly so fortunate this trip. Win some, lose many.
Below is our beautiful room in the Augustus Tower. They tried once again to stick us back in the Palace Tower, which is nice, but a hellova long walk. So I whined and they stuck us here in the schwanky place. Squeaky wheel DOES get the grease. It was purdy, I could probably live in this hotel room very easily. What more does a girl need, afterall?

Even after the drunken debacle of Jacuzzi Tub Sex last trip, we STILL tried it again. Albeit sober this go round. Still, just as unsuccessful. Kenny got a Charlie Horse. Will we ever learn?

On Saturday I planned to have Nudie Pool day. Caesars has the Nudie Venus Pool area. You need to show identification to get in. I was prepared. I was going to let the Girls hang out in all their 39 year old glory, and get some sun. But alas, I started my Poolside Ventures far too late in the day and there was nary a lounge chair to be found poolside, Nudie Pool or Basic Business. I had to take my book back to the room and pout, replanning for Sunday and decided to use the Salon services on Saturday instead. I managed to get an appointment for a manicure.

And while I was there, I got all caught up in the fanciness of the salon and decided to get a hair trim as well. I know,I know, it goes totally against my Salon Protest, but I'm a huge sucker for marketing, and it's a totally cool salon. Luckily, I didn't have Scissorshands working on my head, and she just trimmed up the ends and de-bushed the sides a bit. I'm happy with it. She actually complimented my color, which I secretly gloated about since it's my at-home concoction.

I was a rather.....shocked into silence....when I saw the bill for these two innocent little services. I didn't ask cost, I mean, if you have to ask, you can't afford it or some nonsense like that I've heard. I figured, $40/manicure, $75 tops for a hair cut and style. WRONG.

$75 Manicure. Before Tip.
$125 Cut & Style. Before Tip.

Makes a pair of La Perla Panties seem like a bargain, in fact. Luckily, I had plenty of Comp Points to take care of the entire bill except for tip, so it didn't send me into a heart attack. The manicure is even a worse deal than a pair of La Perlas - it chips off in a week (or less, as the story goes), the panties at least last and well, are a Piece of Art. Live & Learn.
Sunday dawned bright and early, and I gathered up my poolside necessities and headed on down. Paid $12 for sunblock at the Augustus Towers commissary. And was greeted by this:

I found a lounge chair, but it wasn't for long. Seems that this is "monsoon season" as we were told by a cabbie, and not 15 minutes after I got settled, it began to sprinkle. Having been in Vegas during a Gulleywasher of a storm, I let it drizzle for a few minutes, but once it started picking up speed, I picked up speed, too, and headed back indoors. Drat. There went all hopes for my Vacation Tan.
Had a very fun trip overall, with the highlight being the Garth Brooks concert on Thursday night. Best concert I've ever attended. Surrounded by tall, good-looking athletes, listening to my #1 Man, who could ask for better?
Peace, and do what you love with the one you love.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Best. Concert. Ever.

Worst. Videographer. Ever.

But you can get the gist.

A snipet of the encore, The Dance:

Garth Brooks, I HEART YOU!! WOO HOO!! ~~insert lit lighter and gentle swaying here~~

Better Fucking With Fancy Panties?

Scene: Tracye decides to enter the World of Fancy Underpants and enters La Perla for a peak at Lacy Things.

After being led to the back room to check out the panties only, please, Tracye is taken aback at the hefty pricetags associated with such delicate items.
Tracye: "Um, can you tell me what in the world would make this pair of panties worth $87?"
Saleslady: "Well, the patterns of the lace are only created once, never to be repeated after the season, so truly they are little works of art."
Tracye: "They are meant to cover my butthole."

Saleslady: Wry smile, no words.

And Tracye exits Le Perla, sans "Panty Art" purchase, and happily realizes she does have some boundaries for ridiculous purchases.
The End.

Monday, July 14, 2008

You Can Lead A Cat To Water.....

So I still haven't learned. I just pitched the Cat Jungle Gym Play Thing off the back porch and onto the driveway for Street Widda to perhaps enjoy, since my ungrateful pets paid it no nevermind. And there I go tonight, purchasing yet another Cat-traption for my beloved indoor housepets. This time, the purchase is a Fresh & Clean water fountain, with the promise of providing aerated, filtered water to keep my pets moist on the inside.

Of course, everyone was frightened. But then like the Man of the House that he is, Twink stepped up to the pump and showed the others how to use it. He's very, very brave and big and strong.
He kinda liked it a lot, much more than the play house. Or maybe he was just really thirsty.

Once Twink had enough, Girlie was eyeballing it, hesitantly making her way over to check things out. But I couldn't make her drink...

The pamphlet said to keep their other water out of reach for a day, to try and "force" them to use the new gadget. We predict that Widda will be the last cat to be brave enough to drink from it. I hope I don't awaken to find her little tongue hanging out of her mouth, dehydrated and stuck to the linoleum. That would be a bad outcome. Do you think they can get electrocuted?? It is mixing water with electricity. When is that a good idea?

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Wait For It

"You're the chanciest-taking girl when it comes to your hair that I've ever met," to paraphrase Rob this past week. I would have to agree with him, I will roll the hair dice on a whim, despite past results that have resulted in tears and expensive corrections. I'm on strike from my expensive hair salons. I've been paying far, far too much to have average looking hairs. And they do look average, not anywhere near the $150-$185 prices I've been paying. Yes, girl hair really is that expensive.

Now, that's not to say I haven't liked the color that my girl Sarah does at John Roberts. I do, I think she's the best colorist I've had. But she's difficult to get into (because she's good), and frankly I'm less than impressed with how the hair cuts have been panning out. I've got all these choppy layers that "wing out" at the bottom if I don't give them proper attention. So a more accurate statement is that I'm boycotting hair cuts for a while until everything grows out and just catches up everywhere. Since I'm doing that, I might as well boycott the color and do it myself, saving $100-$130 every 5 weeks. Plus, with the price of gas, I can use the chance to save somewhere in my budget. And really, how bad can it be to just touch up my roots myself for the next few months? Well, it's that phrase right there where things have been known to go awry. How bad can it be, indeed.

Last month I did it myself and just used a Loreal kit purchased for the low, low cost of 2/$10 from Target, resulting in a savings of $180 from the last time I had my hair done professionally at Ladies & Gentlemen in Legacy Village. That worked fine, but the color was just okay, not great. The do-it-yourself job was certainly acceptable, and didn't look $180 worse.

However, I've been thinking it's getting too blond:
.... and I was ready to try something to make it a little bit warmer. A very ambitious undertaking for a non-professional. I've had disastrous results with similar past thoughts. You would think I would have learned by now....but no, apparently there is no learning yet.
Note: the above photo includes my super-sexy Jessica Simpson clip-on weave attachment, which has been pretty successful in evening out the choppy layers that have been cut into my head, and I'm trying to grow out.

So Saturday I went to Cosmo Prof (using Mimi's card that's required for purchases) and bought some professional Redken haircolor, along with a developer and a little application bottle. The color I chose was "sunflower" and the sample was a nice, golden blond. How bad can it be?? Nope, no foreshadowing here. While I was there I also purchased a bunch of shampoo and a new professional hairdryer (I had one, but the motor made a funny little noise last week and I'm frightened to put it very close to my head now), and the whole shopping trip set me back about $180. So a savings? But...I did get a bunch of products that would have cost me triple that amount in the salon, so it really was a long-term savings. The mark-up on shampoo is Ka-Razy. I paid $14.97 for a bottle of the stuff that would have cost me close to $50 at Target (in their "professional" products aisle).
Like the Mad Scientist (or Nutty Professor), I mixed my potions and applied to head, being careful to only apply it to the roots, I didn't want to mess with the highlights that are still in there from my last salon visit in May:

And I waited the 25 minutes Mimi recommended. And almost had a heart attack when I went into the bathroom for the wash-out. "This isn't going to be good," I shouted to Kenny in the other room. Why I wasn't keeping a closer eye on it, I'll never know, but it was seriously DARK and not anywhere near the color of the Sunflower sample that had been on display. I should have captured the pictures, but I was too distraught. The real concern was that I hadn't applied the color all over, and if it was that much darker at the roots, then I would officially be a two-tone head after the rinse. I was having a moment, particularly since we had a baseball game to attend in T Minus 1 Hour. No time to really make the "fix," even if I had an idea of what to do about it. I shampooed, rinsed, repeated.
And TA-DA, After The Rinse:

Results were not nearly as dire as I had feared! It was darker, the highlights blended okay, and although there's more red in it now that I'm used to, it did a good job warming up the color. All for $3. Which is the cost of professional color, by the way. So SUCK ON THAT, PROFESSIONALS! Ha! This is also a good picture to see the "choppy-ness" that I'm unhappy with, why the fuck they've butchered the bottom to this extent is beyond me. But I'll fix it, by just not going to the salon for six months. And frankly, if I cut the visits down to 3 or 4 times a year for a professional "shape up", I'll be saving over a thousand dollars. Mimi said she'll trim up the ends for me when I need it done, that way it'll keep someone with Scissors for Hands from going crazy on my head. So there's the big hair story. Aren't ya glad you stuck around for all that!?!!

Scissors for Hands

Speaking of someone with Scissors for Hands, I had our giant hedge clippers out on Saturday, trimming up the bushes in the neighbor's yard that line our driveway. I had pulled in the drive with the windows down on the Lexus and the bushes were so overgrown they shouldered in through my window, for Chrissake. The Honeysuckles were Gone Wild, thriving on the excessive amount of rain we've been having. So I stunted their growth, going crazy like a salon stylist, chopping in lots of layers. And as I was frightened to pick up the clippings that fell back under the big bush (not a fan of bugs, et al, that may be lurking under the hedge), I had to hone my Scissors-Hand skills and use the clippers to ever-so-gently grasp, but not cut, the fallen debris and pick it up and put it in the trash can. It was quite a fun experiment, to test myself to see if I really could survive if I did indeed one day awaken with scissors for hands. I believe I could, and still pet cats without cutting off their tails.

More Waiting Games

Here I sit, waiting for AT&T to show up and look into our DSL line. We're up and running at the moment, but who knows how long that'll last. It's been on and off since last Wednesday, and since it was working for the greater part of Saturday afternoon, I cancelled the scheduled Sunday service call. Then it stopped working. I was LIVID when I called to re-schedule the service and they informed me the earliest they could get out here would be Monday between 8 and 5. I WENT OFF on that customer service rep, I'm sure we're flagged as potential crazies. It went something along the lines of, "I'm paying YOU, you don't have any problem taking my money, but you're going to CHARGE ME if you come out to make a service call and there is no problem at the time, but I'm supposed to be okay with sitting around for 9 fucking hours like MY TIME isn't a consideration, not to mention the 5 days we haven't had service, and if someone isn't out there on Sunday, don't bother coming on Monday because I'll have a NEW SERVICE out there to hook up a DSL to the house by then." So someone's coming out today (Sunday). My call was escalated, and Kenny was just in awe of watching me in action. And we're getting a credit to our bill for our days without service. But still, here I sit around the house awaiting the Service Dude. I sent Tim & Ken to the movies, Tim's waiting on the dry wall guy to come out and finish his ceiling repair, so it's a whole day of waiting and only one of the three of us should be inconvenienced. I have a lot of stuff to take care of around here, anyway, and will enjoy a few hours to myself. I need to clean and sort and look for the tickets I've misplaced to Bill Mahar for August. So I'll take care of all that, and they can go enjoy Hellboy II. It's a win-win. For now, I blog and wait.

Luckily for me, I have a nice little catpanion (that's a cat companion, a new word I just created!) to keep me company whilst I fuck off on the Internet rather than do Productive Things:

This is exactly why I need an oversized recliner, something big enough for Stanley's pillow. He likes to nap in the chair while I compute. It would be lonely without my little cat friend next to me.

On a final note, Saturday night Ken and I had tickets to the Indian's game. It was fireworks night. What a spectacular show!! Wow, the best fireworks show I believe I've ever seen. And we won the game, so it was even more fun. Ken and I had a hot dog, but true to our no alcohol plan, we stuck with Diet Pepsi. It was odd to be at a ballgame without a beer in one hand, but it certainly wasn't hard. I didn't have beer at golf, either, which as much as this sounds like I have a drinking problem, I don't. I do not make a habit of drinking, we don't even have beer in the house, but there are certain events that go hand-in-hand with having a beer. Golf and Baseball are two of those events. It's more of the habit than anything. But the You Are What You Eat plan requires zero libations, and so that's what we're going to do. Other than during Vegas this week, we will be having some sort of cocktails, I'm not "dieting" on vacation. That's crazy talk.

Peace and do something "chancie" this week - results may be a pleasant surprise!

Friday, July 11, 2008

Thieves In the Night

Something is wrong with the fucking Internet connection at our house. I've been offline since Wednesday, and horror-of-horrors, we've actually had to sit and have face-to-face conversations since we can't immerse ourselves in the innane-ness of Cyberspace. Frankly I'm sick of talking to these 2 yahoos at night (Ken & Tim) ~~ ha ha! No, seriously. Really, I'm kidding, of course I like to chat with fingers say yes, my headshake says no :)
With the speedy response time of AT&T Tech Support, we're supposed to have someone out here on Sunday. WTF. Sunday?? I have work to do from home that requires the Internet. I need to order Important Things. Actually, I do, some Toastmasters stuff. We have access at the moment because we tapped into an unsecured line from the dude across the street. I'm worried that I may get hacked into, but then Timmy and I figured we're two of the smarter fuckers on the block and if we don't know how to do it, these Parma Pollacks/Hillbillies won't know how to do it, either. So we're banking on the stupidity of others to keep us safe. Not so sure that's a bad bet. Just in case, I won't be accessing my Off Shore Bank Accounts.

A fun weekend is planned, we're going to the Tribe game Saturday night, then joining our friendies at the Sly Fox in Great Northern. Should be an earlier night, Kenny and I have given up the hooch until Vegas. We're on a new healthful eating/drinking approach since I've been obsessively watching You Are What You Eat on the BBC, and that nixes alk-ee-hol. Not to mention red meat, sugar and an overabundance of starches. And I now view broccoli as little "brushes" sweeping through my large intestines, cleaning shit that's been stuck in the nooks and cranny's right out, making me spic-and-span on the inside. So that's that. We're sticking to this until our October 14-day indulgence vacation, with one little time-out for Vegas this coming week.
My garden is flourishing, which is no surprise considering the abundance of rain we've had. I've got many green tomatoes growing, and now wish I would have planted more. I could be canning, for Chrissake. Yeah, right :) I would post pictures, but that'll wait until my own DSL is back up & running. I fear this is a tentative connection at best.

That is about a wrap-up, logging off before I get hacked into and my identity gets stolen. Who the hell would wanna steal all this - have at it, I say! Be me! Go, get all the Greatness That Is Me and BE IT. Ha! Just moments ago Kenny and I were talking about a wedding date, and he informed me I'm not really very nice to live with overall and he's not too inclined to join the Parade of Husbands that have marched through my life. He may be right, he may be right.
Peace, and if someone does decide to steal my life, I hope like hell they take all the clutter with them. And the unwashed laundry.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Yada Yada

Happy Birthday, America! After a hectic Fourth of July day spent running errands and taking care of some things for my grandmother, Kenny and decided we didn't want to miss out on fireworks, so we scadaddled up to Tri-C and made it just in time to spread out our new plastic-on-one-side-soft-fleecy-flannel-on-the-other blankie we got as our latest gift from Caesar's Palace. We had a great view, until a family of idiots decided to stand directly in front of we moved. Gotta love the inconsiderate nature of people. So we watched fireworks and canoodled on our blankie and just enjoyed a nice July evening in the city. It took us about an hour trying to get out of the parking area, but no worries, not as if we were in any rush to go anywhere. We used the time to chat and laugh and talk about people. Good times and a good, fun evening.

As I mentioned, I spent the better part of the afternoon with my grandma, I had picked up some new chair cushions and some living room curtains for her so I went out and got them all settled into place for her. The best thing I had picked up for her, however, was a bunch of celery. Sophie had asked me to keep an eye out for it, she couldn't find it for less than $2.99, and she'll be damned if she'd paying that much for celery. You would have thought I had handed her an Olympic medal when I presented her with celery purchased for the low low price of $1.79. I received the Star Granddaughter award for the day.

Our friend Dan was a Big Check recipient at an Indian's game recently!! Somehow he was chosen for some sort of contest, and ended up coming in 2nd place to the tune of $100. First place won $10,000, which makes it a bittersweet Big Check award. I'm still trying for one of my own - I now know 2 people who have been Big Check recipients - Geri and now Dan. Who wouldn't want to be a Big Check winner???!!

A Meeting of the Mindless

Thursday night was an impromptu night downtown for me. Kenny was at Shooters, he's filming some footage for a DVD he and his friend are creating with the production company they've started (are starting/whatever stage it's technically in, I'm not sure), and I had mentioned to some of the girls about it and they ended up down there. I didn't want to miss out once I found out they were going to be there, so I got gussied up, called a cab and met up with everyone down there. Stef was teaching me her "stick out your ass and grind" dance moves. Somehow I managed to get quite tipsy, and I only had two beers!! Kenny pointed out that they were two 32 oz. beers, but still, it was only 2 beers technically. The evening ended with my climbing into bed with Timmy, where we talked about his fucked up relationship with his nutty girlfriend for about two hours. It went sorta like this:

Tracye: stumbling up the stairs, tells Kenny, "I'm gonna go get the scoopage on Timmy's latest fight with Crazy."

Kenny: "Not a good idea, it's 1:30 in the morning."

Tracye: "Okay, I'll be up in a little bit."

Tracye: walks through Timmy's house, to the back bedroom, turns on overhead light, "Timmy, you up??"

Timmy: bolts upright in bed, rubbing sleep out of his eyes, looking disoriented, "What the fuck??? Oh, it's you, come on over!" And moves over in bed, making room for me to drunk talk with him about all sorts of good drunk tropics.

Timmy was drunk, too, having been out earlier in the evening partying up his newly single status with the Mailman (or Maleman as he likes to put it).

Kenny said it was a meeting of the mindless.

Other Stuff of Even Less Importance

Timmy's bathroom has been leaking from various points for the past few weeks. Started in the corner, ruined the flooring, it was deemed to be caused from our bathroom and the fact that I hang my body puff on the bathtub faucet. How a 1/2 oz. body puff could be blamed for that, I'll never understand, but whatever. The puff was moved, and surprise surprise, the bathroom continued to leak. Only it had moved over from the corner of the wall to the ceiling, and when Tim took a shit, was getting dripped on by our shit water. Nice. So they came and cut a hole in his ceiling, replaced the wax ring in our toilet, and climbed up into our attic for God knows what reason. In doing so, they discovered our insulation was wet, and a roofer came out and found the real root of the problem: a 1/2 in gap between the flashing somewhere up there in the roof, and these heavy, heavy rains of the past few weeks have caused it to leak and somehow miss our house, but run down into his. Water's a funny thing, but so far so good.

"What's the point of all this?" I hear you sigh and mutter under your breath. Well, the point is, my house is a total trashed mess - still - from the attic shenanigans as well as taking everything out of my bathroom while they got to the root of it all. The attic access is through our bedroom closet, and that shit was taken out while I was at work, and let's just say it's a jumbled up catastrophe, not to mention insulation is mixed in with everything. I've been putting it away a little at a time, because I might as well clean out the closet and take everything that's not regularly used to the basement for storage rather than have it in the house. It's just all fucked up at the moment. What else is new.

But the real point of all this is, Timmy wasn't getting shit and piss water dripped down his back afterall. It was a good day for him when he found this out.

Kenny had gas really bad last night, and made sure to walk ahead of me so I not only got caught up in the draft of it all, but the people walking behind me thought it was ME. I saw them fanning the air around them and pointing at me. Yeah, try to convince someone it's not you, really, it's the guy in front of me. Riiiiight.

And that, my friends, has been the Fourth of July weekend. Well, there's more, but really, I can't seem to make much sense so I might as well stop now and move along for the night. Peace.